Damned the Clocks, Full Speed One Hour Ahead

Today is the second coming of Sunday in March, the annual day of reckoning on which the abominable Daylight Saving Time rises from the depths of some unfathomable body of water (no doubt teeming with unthinkable nightmares and innumerable sunnies) to shift forward the clocks one hour closer to our moment of reckoning. What more evidence do you need to know the government is run by a dark cabal worshipping the Old Ones? Do they worship Dread Daylight Saving Time out of malice for mankind, or are these souls, forever lost, merely misguided or perhaps possessed by things too horrible to blog about? I cannot myself say. All the same, they must be stopped. They must!